Oh where to begin…
What a year it has been. I’ve been thinking about this post for days wondering what I was going to say. I mean a year is a long time… but somehow it passed by so quickly. It wasn’t until this morning that I finally sat down to take on this daunting task.
Looking back on it, this year was filled with some firsts, travel, laughs, tears, hardships, adventures, the list could go on forever. Oh, and how could I forget… 2021 gave me this, right here, what you’re reading right now. January of this year, I built up the courage to start my journey with this blog and I couldn’t be more grateful for what it has given me so far. I have learned so much. I feel more knowledgeable and inspired than ever. It made me step out of my comfort zone and try things I’d never done before.
I think if I were to sum up 2021 with just one word it would have to be growth.
When I look back at where I was in January compared to now, I feel like a new person, even a little different (but in a good way). When it turned from 2020 to 2021 this time one year ago, my back surgery had only happened about 2.5 months previous. I was still dealing with a lot of physical and mental struggles. I was still in the mindset that I would never be the same again, and in a way, honestly, that ended up being true… just not in the way I thought I meant it at the time. When I had that mindset a year ago it was all negative. I doubted that I would ever run again, carry my nieces again, dance, get up off the floor without pain or weakness, etc. Little did I know, I would come out of this year stronger than I’d ever been.
January came with a lot of recovery. I was attending physical therapy about 2 times a week and that was about it. Honestly, that month was sort of a blur to me… all I know is that I finished my fall semester the night before my spring semester started. I felt like I couldn’t catch a break.
January quickly turned into February and honestly, I wasn’t feeling much change. Same routine – college, physical therapy, repeat. Although… February did bring me one of my firsts… I got a tattoo! Now to many that may not seem like a big deal, but I don’t know, to me it represented a small shift from the person I used to be, to who I am now. Growing up, school, sports, and dance were my life. The only time I spent at home was to sleep and other than that I kept a very strict schedule. Don’t get me wrong, I would never dream of changing all those years and the person I was then, but now, when I reflect, I was stressed and a teeny bit “uptight”. Honestly, I hate that word, but I had very high expectations for myself and left little to no room for error. And listen, I don’t think that was necessarily bad, but I did need to loosen up and learn to enjoy the little things in life and have a little fun. I needed to learn that not everything was so serious. So, as February continued I made my tattoo appointment. For years I had loved the saying “N’oublie pas de vivre” which in French means “don’t forget to live.” It was crucial that I learned to slow down, take in life and all of its joys, and to take risks.
As those 28 short days of February turned into March, physical therapy finished and I needed to find a new outlet for my recovery and strength building. I started swimming, going for longer walks, and began my reformer pilates journey. I even put on my hard shoes and danced for the first time since surgery on St. Patrick’s Day!
All in all, January through March pretty much were my recovery months. Most of my time and energy went there. It was exhausting, but by March I started to see that the future was better than I thought. I saw that it was going to be okay.
From that point on, April through this very moment has been a whirlwind. I turned 19 in April, rode a plane for the first time on my own, and went to Disney World! May brought the end of my freshman year of college, I joined a sorority, started reading more (in fact I read Greenlights by Matthew Mcconaughey and probably didn’t stop talking about it for weeks…), and I visited one of my favorite places, Saratoga. In the blink of an eye, May turned into June and the memories kept on coming.
If I were to go through every single little thing I did this year that was significant to me, we would be here until next new years eve… So, instead I’ll sum up the important things, the life lessons if you will.
Above all, my passion for what I am doing right here, right now has grown immensely. I started this blog with a small vision of just sharing fashion trends and it has grown into so much more than that. I learned I wanted to help make a difference. I found new inspirations in my life who turned me over to a better, more thoughtful lifestyle. I learned to live a lighter life. Nothing is enjoyable if we make things so darn heavy all the time…
Speaking of… Please don’t get me wrong, I know life isn’t all sunshine and rainbows all the time. With all of the positives I highlighted above, there were almost (if not just) as many hardships. Broken friendships, low self-esteem and body confidence, death, lots of tears, uncertainty, and stress. But, I had to learn that in most situations it’s all in how you handle it. In reflection, I complained quite a bit in the beginning half of this year. I would start a conversation with the words “not to complain, but…” and then would continue for the next hour or so. Granted, it’s great to vent sometimes, but I also found better, healthier outlets. For example, after reading Matthew Mcconaughey’s book, I was so inspired to start journaling and I’m so happy I did. I found that it drew me away from my phone and all of that loud and unnecessary social media. And as another plus, sometimes if I was really upset or preoccupied about something, I would go write about it instead of blabbing about it for hours. I found a different outcome in those responses. When I wrote about it, by the time I finished, I was pretty much at peace with the situation. On the other hand, when I was in the habit of blabbing about it on and on… by the time I got done, I was still so worked up and wired, I was right back where I was when I started the conversation, if not worse!
To finish up, I want to leave you with, what I consider to be, one of the most important ideas I learned this year. Be very conscious of the people you surround yourself with. As an example and going off of the idea of complaining like I discussed above – it is very likely that you may find yourself complaining because it’s a common behavior of those around you. You may realize you’ve outgrown those people. Growth is good! Sometimes these realizations may be hard, but let me tell you they are life changing. No matter who you are, reading this right now, you have so much potential. I want you to know that whatever dream or vision you have for yourself, you can achieve it, but along the way, you’re going to need people who support you and who believe in you. The hard truth of all of that is sometimes, you might be all you’ve got. I swear this isn’t meant to be a downer! It’s more like an act of tough love in a way…? The main idea is that in order for you to do the amazing things you want to do, you have to be all in with yourself. Healthy mind, healthy body, healthy relationship with both yourself and others. 2022 is your year and you can accomplish whatever you dedicate yourself to. Last night, I happened to listen to a podcast and it was perfect timing for the coming of the new year. It was called the Ed Mylett Show and the episode was called “Small Habit, Big Results w/ James Clear.” Highly recommend! If you’re looking for some insightful new year motivation, I promise you will find it there. THE ED MYLETT SHOW: Small Habits, Big Results w/ James Clear on Apple Podcasts
Thank you for all of your continued support throughout this first year of The Environista! I am so appreciative and grateful. I look forward to next year and all it has in store. See you in 2022!
